Rock My World!
Why would I want to control myself when it is so amazingly delicious to follow my natural urge to explode in orgasm? Well, what if developing control gave you the ability to extend the ecstatic pleasure of orgasm not just by minutes, but by hours? I call it riding the waves of bliss.
When I was a cocky young lad of 32 years old, I was lucky enough to date one of the most beautiful women on the planet. The first time I actually penetrated her deliciousness, I was so excited that I burst in orgasm inside of her within a few minutes. It was amazing! Yet her facial expression after I came was devastating. She even said, “Is that all you’ve got?” Ouch!!!
A couple decades later now, I am thrilled to say that I’ve gained near perfect control over ejaculation – and it totally rocks!!! Riding the extended waves of bliss for as long as I want is literally like being in heaven on Earth.
My favorite form of this I call “surfing the 9s.” I use a pleasure scale from 0 to 10, where zero means no pleasure and 10 means the most incredible ecstasy imaginable. In dealing with ejaculation, 10 means the point of no return where you can’t help but shoot your wad. When I’m surfing the 9s, my pleasure level is practically off the charts — a 9 or above on the pleasure scale — but I’m not ejaculating. As I never reach the explosion of 10 when it all then ends, I can literally ride the waves of orgasmic bliss for over an hour or more.
My devastating experience with that beautiful woman at age 32 put me on a mission to develop better control over my ejaculation. I discovered that the best way to tame my bucking’ bronco was to first find the reins by myself. Below are the steps I recommend for taming your precious tool to maximize both your pleasure and that of your partner. Try these methods and I guarantee success or your money back. What a great deal, especially since you are paying nothing for this! ;o)
For starters, practice with yourself. If you don’t masturbate, get over it. If you want to develop control, you’re going to have to surrender to the joy that most men experience by playing with yourself. Recognize that even when you are self pleasuring, the desire to explode in ejaculation is strong. If you want to develop extended waves of pleasure, you need to develop the muscle of your will power.
You can start with this challenge. Play with your wand until it gets hard. Then as soon as it is good and hard, stop. Let it get soft again. It’s not as easy as you might imagine. Taking slow, deep breaths can help. If you fail the first or second time, go easy on yourself, yet also set a clear intention for success the next time. If you can do this even once, you’ve made the first big step to developing self control.
In preparation for the next steps, notice how it feels when you first get hard while touching yourself. What level of pleasure would you rate this on a scale of 1 to 10. Most guys would give it something like a 4 to a 6.
Once you’ve got the first step down, see if you can get yourself hard and then move a notch or two up the pleasure scale. But then again once you do, you must stop! The urge to splurge is even stronger now, but if you want to reach the state of extended pleasure, you’ve got to use all your will power and stop completely. You are only successful if you do this and then let yourself gradually go limp. This in itself is a great skill to have. Once you get good at this, no more blue balls.
If you’ve mastered that, now you’re ready for the big challenge. Get yourself good and hard and then bring yourself up to a 7 or 8 on the pleasure scale. This is where you just start to feel that urge to explode. And the stronger that urge, the harder it is to stop. Your will power to stop is like a muscle that you have to train. If you exercise this muscle enough times, you will get stronger and reap the rich rewards.
Paying attention to your breath can be very helpful in achieving control. Whenever you reach a point where you feel like you might lose control, take a slow, deep breath while imagining the energy from your throbbing organ slowly rising up your spine as you breathe in. I find myself pursing my lips and sucking the air in as I do this. Inviting that energy to spread beyond my genitals somehow makes it easier to get control back. Give it a try!
Once you’ve gotten to a high level of control, you can really have fun playing with it. See if you can masturbate and stay at a level 5 to 7 on a pleasure scale for three minutes. Then try five minutes. Then see if you can take it to 10 or 15 minutes and enjoy the extended pleasure. Can you hold a level 7 or 8 or eventually even level 9 for a good while? Can you reap the huge benefits of “surfing the 9s”?
Set goals for yourself and have fun exploring. And if you blow it at any time, no problem. Celebrate the rich and delicious orgasm, yet then reestablish your commitment to become a master of your own pleasure. It takes practice to build that muscle.
I had so much fun with this that I ended up creating a crazy goal for myself. After lots of practice, I got to a place where, after surfing the 9s for a while, I could become so sensitive and bring myself to such an incredible peak that a simple, light touch of my finger would cause me to explode. Such incredible ecstasy!!!
Try it out! Once you’ve become a master at maintaining yourself at the 9 pleasure level for extended times, you can use a lighter and lighter touch to keep yourself right at the peak. Eventually you can keep yourself there with just the light touch of one finger. Once you’ve reached that level of mastery, give yourself a reward and allow yourself to explode with just that one light touch. Yummmm!!!!!
Master of Bliss
The next step is to take this skill you’ve developed in private and put it into practice with a partner. Most people find that surfing the waves of bliss is more difficult to maintain with a partner than alone. But I can assure you that if your partner is willing to support you in this, you will soon be able to master your bliss full on with your partner, as I was. That way both of you can ride the incredible waves of bliss for as long as you like.
If you’ve got a willing partner, explain the 0 to 10 scale and tell them what you are doing. Ask them to support you in getting to a certain number on the scale and then stopping to maintain control. They can even breathe in with you and help you to bring the energy up your spine and away from your genitals whenever you start to lose control. Once they see the benefits, you may have a very willing partner. And believe me that there is nothing like being able to surf the 9s while you are inside of your lover. It is truly heaven on Earth!!!
Once you’ve become a master of bliss able to stretch your orgasm out for as long as you like, you’re sexual self esteem will sky rocket. You will have much greater confidence and ease in dating and/or in playing sexually with your partner. Others will pick up on this and almost certainly be more attracted to you. And once they’ve been with you, they will almost certainly want more. The benefits to developing greater control over your orgasm are tremendous!
And as you are developing these skills, don’t be hard on yourself. Set clear intentions and goals, but have fun with the process and don’t take it too seriously. That can be great advice, by the way not just for developing sexual skills, but also for life in general. Have fun with it, and may you find your way to ever greater ecstasy and bliss both with yourself and with your partner. Enjoy!!!
Written by the founder of this website
October 13, 2016 at 12:31 am
This is wonderful, Thanks Fred! Love the clarity of the practice
October 14, 2019 at 8:30 pm
I was delighted to read your sweet coaching for extended pleasure.
Turn on is about 8 now. I Paused to write this appreciation
March 9, 2021 at 7:01 pm
Thanks for your kind words, David and SaRina. May we all find ever more ways to expand our sexual lives and deepen our relationships.